Haunted by Mondrian

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Self portrait with bird (actually my psychologist M).

I must confess the Mondrian paintings I posted before are worrying me. If the man did such beautifully painted paintings, pushing his oil paints around the canvas to get that strange effect: semi realism, did he enjoy making it? That strange red and blue tower in a yellow dune landscape and then: Intellectualisms or 'religious' Fatalism.

As 'begeistered' or driven he might have been, did he ever miss the FUN? Did he give up something for a higher something? My last tree was painfully realistic yet I didn't paint it like that. It just simply happened. So I stared at a canvas yesterday. I made it as sweet, soft and suggestive as possible. Then I want to re-introduce some 'intellectualism. I will make an 'Ode to Mondrian's lost love'.

It is 3.38 in the morning and today I did nothing, just stared. And we had the cat's stitches removed from her tummy.
I rearranged my work table, all the shit on the left I moved to the right.

But I kept seeing this huge soft pink and yellow. This big fat pink canvass, using the smell of early morning. Wallowing in self contentment, if that exists. I'll show it what a Theo van Doesburg does on a lazy morning. Introduce it to something very political. Or maybe I'll go to the History Channel on Austar.
In progress stage 1, 080509.